Divorce. Death of a spouse. Death of a pet. A health diagnosis. Losing one’s home in a natural disaster. Job loss.
These are often called “primary losses” – often the main loss, obvious to you and those around you. But what about all the other losses that occur alongside primary losses?
These are called secondary losses, sometimes referred to as “additional” or “ indirect” losses. Like the primary loss, they too are grieved.
Although there is a lot of literature on secondary losses related to death of a loved one, there is not much when it comes to job loss. In this article, I hope to bring attention and awareness to secondary losses when the primary loss is job loss, why it is important for career professionals to understand secondary losses and some brief pointers on how to support your clients.
Note: Your client may also be experiencing other primary losses in addition to job loss, which will have their own associated secondary losses. It is important to be mindful of how these losses affect your client. However, for the purposes of this article, I will focus on secondary loss associated with job loss.
An introduction to secondary loss
The fact that a loss is “secondary” to a primary loss does not mean it any less impactful. The grief a client experiences from a secondary loss may actually be larger, more complex and complicated, and more painful than the primary loss. Secondary losses can often be:
- Non-death-related
- Disenfranchised and minimized
- Unlabelled and unprocessed
- Ambiguous (ongoing, no closure, psychological and/or physical, intangible)
- Anticipatory (grieving a loss to come)
- A compounding factor in grieving the primary loss
Grief is a response to a loss (such as a job loss), so the journey of grief requires recognizing and labelling the losses. Sometimes, clients may be subconsciously grieving a loss that they do not see in front of them. A loss can also be subjective – what the client feels is a loss is unique to them.
Several factors can affect or “shape the grief” including other primary losses, the circumstances of the job loss, the client’s personality, their past experiences, their current life situation (family, finances, support system, other stressors) and their health (physical and mental).
Some common secondary losses after job loss include:
- Identity and roles: Vocational, role in family, financial status
- Confidence, self-worth, self-esteem
- Faith, loss of hope/dreams
- Income, security, stability, retirement plans, routine and structure
- Friendships, sense of community, social connection, belonging
- Sense of purpose, meaning, mattering
Read more from Fanie Zis
How to help clients get what they need from stress leave
Is the sunk cost fallacy affecting your client’s career decisions?
Myths about the role of emotions in career coaching
Why understanding secondary loss matters in careers work
Although you may not be counselling or coaching your client through grief and loss on a formal level, to this I say:
No matter what your role, whether it is grief work or not, grief will present itself.
Although painful, grieving is an inevitable part of life, and is vital to our survival as it assists us in healing, integration and adaption. Processing grief after job loss is essential to support a client to find another job, navigate a career change – or whatever their plan may be post-job loss. It is equally important to recognize and understand some of the secondary losses your client may be experiencing.
In holding space for your client’s grief and secondary losses and integrating this into your approach, you support their career development journey by:
- Helping the client identify and label the secondary losses so that they can grieve them
- Providing a safe space for releasing emotions and processing grief that may be affecting your client’s action plan and their ability to move forward
- Cultivating a holistic approach to career development by supporting other areas in a client’s life, which may be indirectly and directly affecting the course of their career development journey
- Being better able to identify areas where your client may need support either through you or through referrals to external resources (i.e. finances, housing, mental health)
- Designing a health and wellness plan to support their grieving journey
6 ways to support your client
How you support your client will be dependent on numerous factors including your professional scope and agreement/role and your relationship with the client.
Below are some ways to support your client that can be applied across multiple contexts. Take what you like and what you feel is appropriate to your situation.
- Educate yourself on grief and loss. You may not be counselling your client on grief and loss but having this understanding can help you empathize and better support them.
- Ask, don’t assume. Listen to your client and ask them about their experience. Be mindful that your client may actually feel that they are more affected by the secondary losses they are experiencing. Do not assume the loss of the job itself is where there is the most grief.
- Help the client label and identify the losses. This is essential so the client can honour and process each unique loss and grieve it.
- Validate and acknowledge your client’s loss, grief and emotions. Avoid judging by making comparisons and using “at least” statements.
- Be present and witness their pain (Just … listen)
- Refer clients to appropriate grief and loss support: Know the scope of your services for the client and refer to a grief counsellor or coach if needed.
I hope this article has given you a deeper understanding of secondary losses, what your clients may be experiencing post job loss, and some ways to support them in navigating their way forward during a time of grief and transition.
