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Trailing spouses: The challenge of coaching high-performance newcomers

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While hundreds of thousands of newcomers enter Canada each year, Statistics Canada does not count the number of professional employees transferred to Canada by global companies. That number can vary from year to year due to changes in immigration policies, economic conditions and the strategies of individual companies.

Nevertheless, this class of workers is part of a professional, managerial and technical elite that makes a significant contribution to our GDP. Many of them arrive with a “trailing spouse.” Dismiss any stereotypes of traditional nuclear families with a male breadwinner, stay-at-home wife and two children because trailing spouses represent a wide diversity of identities.

I have coached hundreds of trailing spouses since 2009 with the Impact Group, a career coaching firm based in St. Louis, Missouri that helps to relocate employees of Fortune 500 companies to Canada. In most cases, these spouses are not financially stressed by their relocation, since the employed spouse usually enjoys a lucrative salary and benefits. In addition, the company usually arranges their travel, visas and short-term housing. It’s more a question of what trailing spouses want to prioritize for their families and careers. For example, if they have children, they usually emphasize a new house and transition to new schools. If they don’t have children, they often focus on a quick integration into their community and job market.

George Dutch will be diving deeper into the topic of “Trailing Spouses” at CERIC’s Cannexus24 conference, taking place virtually and in-person in Ottawa from Jan. 29-31, 2024. Learn more and register at cannexus.ceric.ca

Nevertheless, imagine yourself as a trailing spouse who (as in most cases) has an established career and lucrative income but chooses to uproot themselves and accompany their partner to another country that may have unfamiliar language, customs and culture … and no prospect of a job! How would you feel? Mixed emotions, surely.

These emotions can range from great anticipation to crippling anxiety. When I relocated from Canada to Australia many years ago with my spouse (but no children) and no prospect of a job, I landed there with a sense of adventure, a curiosity to learn and try new things, and some open-mindedness and cultural sensitivity about having experiences that were different than what I was used to. Yes, we felt a good deal of anxiety but we were young and full of hope and ambition. I see many of these traits in trailing spouses, too.

However, this honeymoon phase of enjoying the thrill of a new experience usually gives way to the harsher reality of finding a job in a new country. For some spouses, this problem is solved quickly if they can work remotely with their previous employer, land a role with that company’s operations in their new country or get hired by their spouse’s employer.

But in my experience, most trailing spouses have to join the ranks of Canada’s jobseekers. The honeymoon phase becomes a crisis phase. Some spouses withdraw from the job search; it’s just too hard. Others get discouraged by the devaluation of their non-English-speaking overseas education and experience. Many are limited in their ability or motivation to reach out for help from family, friends, other expats or a career coach.

“This honeymoon phase of enjoying the thrill of a new experience usually gives way to the harsher reality of finding a job in a new country.”

Human nature being what it is, I find that most trailing spouses eventually adjust to their new circumstances. They establish new routines and things start to seem normal. They adapt to cultural differences in Canada, whether it be our egalitarianism, multiculturalism, rationalism or other norms. Sooner or later, most trailing spouses become “bicultural” in some sense of the word, as they feel at ease with both their former and new cultures. This is when they move into the acceptance phase of their journey – when they are willing and able to master certain strategies and tactics for a successful job search.

Understanding these phases and actively listening to the individual stories of trailing spouses can help career coaches design, develop and deliver strengths-based job search strategies that enable these clients to find work and thus contribute significantly to the Canadian economy.

In my session, I will share some specific strategies and tactics that have worked for my trailing spouse clients. By doing so, I aim to help you, as a career professional, better serve any client that must adapt to Canada’s job market.

George Dutch Author
George Dutch, MA, CCDP has been a career practitioner for 30 years and has spent 12 years as a Career Coach with The Impact Group (relocation/career services), coaching trailing spouses.
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George Dutch Author
George Dutch, MA, CCDP has been a career practitioner for 30 years and has spent 12 years as a Career Coach with The Impact Group (relocation/career services), coaching trailing spouses.
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