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Conversations around life transitions are a key component of the career development process. Whether our clients are young adults overwhelmed by options, caregivers juggling the demands of children and elderly parents or middle-aged folks re-examining the purpose of their lives, we need to remain conscious of the cyclical life seasons and respond with an understanding of what these transitions mean within the career counselling process. One overlooked life transition that is recently gaining attention in the media is perimenopause – the 4-10 years leading up to menopause that can often result in significant disruptions to many women’s careers and personal lives.
Perimenopause
While menopause is defined as the permanent cessation of menstruation after a full 12 months without a menstrual cycle – and lasts for only a single day – perimenopause includes a host of physical, mental and emotional symptoms that appear 4-10 years prior to menopause, and can appear as early as the mid to late thirties for some woman. Considering that the average age of menopause is 51 years, many women struggle with a vast array of symptoms during the busiest time of their careers – often while juggling work and family responsibilities. In addition to the physical and psychological shifts, moving through this stage often includes a questioning of life purpose. Workplaces can be affected as well, as some women reconsider their willingness or ability to maintain full-time employment while dealing with these challenges.
This is an issue that goes beyond primary health care and seeps into many dimensions of career/life counselling. Acknowledging this transition can go a long way, while providing an invitation for our clients to engage in these conversations if they are ready, able and wanting to do so.
Maintaining current employment
During perimenopause, any combination of physical, mental and emotional symptoms may affect some women’s ability to maintain their previous level of employment. Some women will struggle with heavy and unpredictable menstrual cycles, frequent UTIs (urinary tract infections) or significant sleep disruptions that can make getting through the day difficult. And while hot flashes/flushes are often the focus of jokes, it is no laughing matter when the office thermostat is set at a temperature well above what a perimenopausal woman needs to stay sane, or when there is no variability in the uniform she must wear.
“This is an issue that goes beyond primary health care and seeps into many dimensions of career/life counselling.”
Brain fog and memory challenges can also come as a shock and leave some women questioning whether they can do the job they have done for years. “I thought I should be tested for early dementia,” one client, a 45-year-old woman, confessed to me. “After 20 years with my employer, I have risen to a management position, where staff come to me for answers, and now I sometimes forget where I am going when I enter a room.”
Cognitive disruptions can be a real thing, as estrogen leaves the party and all parts of a woman’s body, including her brain, adjust to the new normal. It leaves some women fearful that they will be perceived as forgetful or unreliable, especially in an information age where knowledge is key to work productivity.
A rollercoaster of emotions
Other women find themselves struggling emotionally, experiencing myriad symptoms from intense rage, to sudden tearfulness, to a lack of interest in activities they once found joyful. This can cause shame in the workplace, as they find themselves acting or speaking in ways that seem outside of their control. “I was on my way to work and just had to keep driving,” one woman told me. “I started crying for no apparent reason and couldn’t stop – and thought it might be better to show up 10 minutes late than to arrive with tears streaming down my face. I had no idea what to tell my boss, so I just said I slept in.”
This can also be a time of transition outside of the workplace, as some women face challenges with their sexual functioning and sense of identity that may profoundly affect their intimate relationships. Put simply – multiple aspects of life may be in flux at the same time. As career counsellors, we need to be aware of how to support the whole person as they navigate their next best steps.
Entering the conversation
We can offer a safe place to have conversations about what women may face in their forties and fifties – issues specific to perimenopause that may be affecting their work-lives. I offer the following suggestions to counsellors who are sensitive to these needs, but unsure what steps or words to use when introducing this subject:
- Checking in. When working with women in their forties and fifties, follow their lead. If they mention hot flashes or memory issues, for example, inquire whether they believe perimenopause symptoms are affecting their work. Ask if they would like to explore this as part of the work you are doing together. Help them find possible solutions within the workplace, like requesting a more flexible schedule, supportive dress code or the ability to work from home.
For women in this age group who do not bring up symptoms that may be attributed to perimenopause, pre-emptively ask if they believe perimenopause may be something that affects their current or future employment and if they want to consider this as part of their career exploration. Career counsellors know that a thorough intake interview includes a whole array of gently asked questions – including those around physical, mental and emotional health. Questions around perimenopause are certainly not out of place.
- One size does not fit all. Some women do not experience any significant perimenopause symptoms and sail through this transition. Others will have no interest in discussing them with you, and this needs to be respected. The conversation can end here, before it even begins.
- Scope of practice. Encourage clients to reach out to their primary health care provider, naturopath or pharmacist if they need information about hormone replacement therapy (HRT) or other treatment options. While recommending specific treatments is not within our scope of practice, it is our responsibility to acknowledge that clients may be experiencing perimenopausal symptoms that affect their work/life. Directing women toward accurate information regarding HRT, now considered best-practice treatment for perimenopause, may be helpful as women learn more about their options.
A source of hope
Offering an empathetic, yet hopeful, attitude when talking about perimenopause in the workplace is the best option. We may not always have a solution for every work-related challenge that clients encounter, but having a general understanding of some of the issues women may face at this stage of life can certainly help. Read about it. Learn about it. Engage in some professional development if you have the opportunity.
Destigmatizing the conversation can go a long way. Above all, it can be rewarding to walk alongside women as they re-examine their purpose, find their voice and pursue meaningful work as they enter the second half of their lives.
